Life Cycles, I: Dawn

Dawn

inhales

the fleeing stars

and ripens

with blushing, fertile warmth

behind a veil

of blue

and

birth, like crimson agony

soaks the linen sky in blood

and fades.

Dawn,

the infant morning,

cries out in fleeting sparrow-song:

live, and see,

and wonder.

AJOA: Day 20

Day 20: A hobby of yours

Well, I do this thing called blogging. Ever heard of it?

AJOA: Days 18 and 19

Day 18: A time when you felt passionate and alive

I once watched a sunrise from the top of a mountain on a cloudy November day. Everyone in the city below was waking up to a gray sky, but where I was, the sky was clear. Denver returned to another dull, noisy, mindless day, but I sat in silence, breathing clean air, awestruck with the beauty of, well, everything. I've never felt so utterly elevated from the realm of human concern, and yet so small, so quiet.

Day 19: A talent of yours

Well, gee, I'm such a talented person! Where could I possibly start?

I'm kidding. Just so you know.

My biggest talent is probably... my ability to be completely awkward even around people I should be totally comfortable with. I don't know if it's in my genes or if it's something I picked up during the course of my life, but either way, it's something I'm particularly good at. I've always considered myself to be a shy person, but sometimes I feel like "shy" is just a nice word for "socially inept."

Yay me.

AJOA: Days 16 and 17

So I fell behind. Whatever. I'm making up for it.

Day 16: A song that makes you cry

I've yet to find a song that can consistently make me cry. Still, sometimes something will catch me in the right (or wrong?) mood and I'll shed a few tears. Although I've never been a fan of pop songs with overly-sentimental lyrics, there are some absolutely heart-wrenching pieces of classical music that I can name. Samuel Barber's Adagio for Strings, for instance. There was a slow movement of a concerto attributed to J.C. Bach that I performed in which, in certain passages, you could imagine the cello actually weeping in your hands.

I guess if I could name a piece of music that I find both profoundly sad and profoundly beautiful, it would be Eric Whitacre's A Boy and a Girl. The composer described himself as "devastated" the first time he read the text and decided to set it-- and that's the way I felt the first time I heard this. If you have a minute, turn up the volume and just listen to the music.

Day 17: An art piece

This one confuses me slightly. An art piece? Like, something I made?

Well, okay then. Actually, I have something better. I drew this lovely picture with 2 Sarahs. It's awesome.

AJOA: Days 14 and 15

Day 14: A vacation you'd like to take

There are lots of places I wish I could go. I'd love to visit Britain, or the Philippines, or New Zealand. I've always wanted to visit the East Coast. Someday, I'm going to drop everything and take a random road trip around the country, and it will be awesome.

However, I think my dream vacation would be a long trip to Italy. I've always imagined learning Italian and going around Italy conversing with anyone who will talk to me. I think that would just be the coolest thing ever.

Photo Credit: http://tinyurl.com/4wf5ha5

Day 15: A person you admire

This one's difficult, because there are a lot of people I admire; I've been incredibly blessed to have been brought up by and around admirable people. So, even though I'm not writing about them today, I should mention that I admire both of my parents, my teachers, my pastors, and my friends. I don't know if anyone's reading this, but you should all know that each of you, in some way or another, inspire me to be a better person. I love you all.

Most people I know won't recognize his name, but the person I've chosen to write about is young adult author John Green. Although he's best known for his novels Paper Towns and Looking for Alaska, I have read neither of these books. I know him primarily as a video blogger, because he and his brother Hank make regular videos on YouTube. The two of them have formed a community known as Nerdfighteria, which is basically a bunch of nerdy people who are dedicated to decreasing "Worldsuck." (Translation: they raise money for charity, do good deeds, etc. etc. I happen to be a Nerdfighter.)

Mr. Green is not my hero. He's not my role model. In fact, I disagree with him on a lot of stuff. The reason I admire him isn't because I think he has all the answers-- he doesn't.

I admire him because he's not afraid to have unbridled enthusiasm for what he loves, even if that makes him a nerd. He never ceases to make me think about and question my own assumptions, beliefs, and values. He's an incredibly gifted wordsmith, and his videos (and books, although I can only speak for the one I've read) have just the right balance of thought-provoking and light-hearted material. And most of all, I admire his ability to find beauty and meaning in things that I overlook every day.

I chose to write about John Green because I hope to someday see the world with eyes as open as his.

AJOA: Day 13

Day 13: A favorite pastime

Finally, an easy choice!

What do I do in my free time? I make music. Whenever I'm alone in the house, I sit down at the piano and just play. I improvise, I write, I have fun. I started really trying to compose when I was (I think) 14. I'm still not terribly good at it, but I've come such a long way from where I started that I'm very optimistic about the future. Eventually, I hope to create something really good. But in the meantime, it's a great way to blow off steam after long practice sessions.

Here's one of my really early compositions:

AJOA: Day 12

Day 12: A song you want played at your wedding

I have a feeling that I'm somewhat unusual in that I've never actually thought about this before. I really don't know. And it's not exactly a pressing concern; I guess my future husband and I will just have to work it out when we get there.

I'm starting to think that I'm a really boring person...

AJOA: Day 11

Day 11: A photo of you taken recently

 Two Sarahs and I climbed a tree. It was fun.

Whole

Several months ago I wrote a poem called "I Am Home (Where)", which I set to music and uploaded to YouTube. Since then, I've been meaning to write more songs, but haven't gotten around to it until now.

Lyrics:

Verse 1:

Breathless with emptiness catching the light

The longer I stand here, the less comes to mind

And it's not what you think

I'm not being naive,

But as free as I am,

I'm alone.

Verse 2:

Reaching for something that has to be there

Each breath a fervent wish, each word a prayer

And it's not what you think

No, I'm not being weak:

This world may be mine,

But it's not home

Chorus:

And I'd go a long way to find

What I hope could someday be mine

It's time to admit I've been waiting for

What I've been created for

Is there nothing more

Than me?

Verse 3:

One day I'll find it, oh one day I'll know

The last missing fragmented piece of my soul

That one final piece

Will make me complete

Yes, I'll understand

When I'm whole.

CHORUS

Alternate Chorus:

And I'd go a long way to find

What I know somehow is mine

It's time to admit I've been waiting for

What I've been created for

'Cause there's so much more

to see.

--

I don't pretend to be particularly good at songwriting, but I'm pretty happy with how this turned out, especially considering the amount of time I spent on it (not that much). This one is much more of a song (instead of a poem-set-to-music) than the last one. Parts of the music had been floating around in my head for a few weeks, but I finally wrote some lyrics and put it all together yesterday.

Some explanations as to why it doesn't sound better than it does:

First of all, I'm recovering from a cold and not singing very well. Second, the accompaniment track is really choppy because I had to record it in pieces and then stick them together in Garageband. Thirdly, the various noise-making objects and animals in my house don't have much respect for recording sessions. And finally, this was all recorded using built-in computer microphones, which is why the quality is so bad.

 But enough excuses!

If you happen to be someone who is good at songwriting, or you know stuff about recording, any comments or constructive criticism you may have would be GREATLY appreciated. Actually, any feedback at all would be great.

Finally, I'll love you forever if you subscribe to my YouTube Channel.

AJOA: Days 9 and 10 (I skipped 8 because it was too hard)

I would have come up with a better excuse but that was too hard, too.

Day 9: A photo you took

Gypsy Jazz in a little cafe in Arvada. My music theory teacher, Aaron Walker, on guitar, and my dad on the bass. I came to listen to the music and I snapped this shot with my dad's iPhone. I like the brightly lit chaos of it, the off-kilter angle, the geometry of the lines, and the focused expressions on the subjects' faces. This is what jazz looks like.

Day 10: A photo of you taken over 10 years ago

Yeah. This pretty much speaks for itself.

AJOA: Day 7

Day 7: Five things you couldn't possibly live without

1. Faith, family, friends. Pretty much "the important things in life." I put them together because it would be a cop-out to list them separately. And I generally try to avoid being lame.

2. Music. Making it, listening to it, writing it; it keeps me alive when I have no words left. (Also, this encompasses everything associated with music: my cello, my piano, my voice, my hearing.)

3.The Internet. This one's not entirely true; I mean, I could survive without internet, but... it wouldn't be pretty. I love me some Facebook.

4. Showers. Laugh if you will, but seriously.

5. My brain. This one's pretty self-explanatory. In fact, I might go so far as to say it's a no-brainer. Ar ar ar.

AJOA: Day 6

Day 6: A moment you wish you could relive

You know what? Get back to me on this one in about 70 years. I've had lots of incredible moments in my life, but... there's so much more to do. Memories are all well and good, but I don't want to waste time re-living when I should be just plain living. When I'm old and frail and I've done all the living I can, I'll start thinking about reliving. But not yet.

AJOA: Day 5

Day 5: A favorite quote

I put off writing this all day, because I couldn't decide on a favorite quote. Now that I'm finally sitting down to write, I still can't decide.

Oddly enough, this is different from the indecision I experienced on the previous posts. For those, it was hard to decide because I have so many favorite books and movies. But I don't have a bunch of favorite quotes. When I tried to think of one, nothing came to mind. A favorite quote should be a sort of motto, a summary or representation of your philosophy on life. And yeah, I have one of those, but I made it up myself. And it would seem awfully egotistical to quote myself in this post.

Someday, I'll find the words I'm looking for. I just haven't yet. So in the meantime, here are a few noteworthy runners-up:

“If you have an apple and I have an apple and we exchange these apples then you and I will still each have one apple. But if you have an idea and I have an idea and we exchange these ideas, then each of us will have two ideas.” -- George Bernard Shaw

"It is our choices... that show what we truly are, far more than our abilities." -- J.K. Rowling

"If I find in myself a desire which no experience in this world can satisfy, the most probable explanation is that I was made for another world." -- C.S. Lewis

 Tune in tomorrow for some more annoying indecision!

AJOA: Day 4

Day 4: A favorite TV show

Okay, I'm officially really tired of this list of favorites. Surprise, surprise: I don't have a favorite TV show. I have several. And most of them are Sci-fi. Because I'm a nerd.

So, here we go. Star Trek and Doctor Who are awesome, but I've decided to write about a fairly new show: Warehouse 13. 

In a nutshell, the show is about two government agents whose job it is to recover dangerous magical artifacts throughout the country and bring them back to a secret Warehouse.

It's not heavy-duty sci-fi like Star Trek, but it's a really fun show. The characters are lovable, the writing is creative, and the artifacts are always interesting. The special effects can be downright hokey at times, but it's a testament to the quality of everything else that you're always willing to look past that. Highly recommended.

AJOA: Day 3

Day 3: A favorite book

As hard as it was to single out a favorite song and a favorite movie in the last couple of posts, this is by far the hardest decision to make. I love books. I love reading. And I really don't have a favorite book.

So I've decided to write about a book --or rather a series-- that has frequently made my favorites list since I first read it a couple of years ago. I've always been a fan of fantasy: I grew up reading Narnia and Harry Potter, and I'll forever have a soft spot for fun, magical adventures. And Alison Croggon's fantasy quartet, The Books of Pellinor, essentially embodies everything that I love about the genre: an engaging story, an expansive fictitious universe, simple good-vs-evil conflicts, and swordfighting. Oh yes.

The Naming, the first book in the series

The plot itself is nothing new; basically, a dark shadow has fallen across the land, and a young peasant  must defeat the gathering forces of evil with her newly discovered magic powers. It's your typical fantasy storyline. What's beautiful about this series isn't the story itself but rather the universe in which that story takes place.

Maerad, the main character, is gifted with the magic powers of the Bards. These Bards are not only wizards, but scholars, healers, artisans, musicians, poets, and so on and so forth. Throughout the kingdoms of Edil-Amarandh, the Bards have built institutes of learning and Bardic tradition, known as Schools.

Over the course of the books, Maerad and the other main characters travel all over the map, and Croggon describes her fantasy world in incredible detail. Each School, and city surrounding it, has its own culture, traditions, poetry, music, cuisine, etc. The pains the author goes to in order to paint a fully developed universe are truly remarkable. While most fantasy stories (especially in the Young Adult genre) will sketch a simple, generic world around their characters, Croggon makes you believe you're really rediscovering a lost civilization.

One of the largest components of the cultural depth is the books' poetry. Croggon is an award-winning poet, and the poetry she incorporates into the stories lends incredible believability to narrative. It's real poetry, not just a bunch of rhyming lines all strung together. A sample:

I am the Lily that stands in the still waters, and the morning sun 

    alights on me, amber and rose;

I am delicate, as the mist is delicate that climbs with the dawn; yea, the

    smallest breath of the wind will stir me.

And yet my roots run deep as the Song, and my crown is mightier

    than the sky itself,

And my heart is a white flame that dances in its joy, and its light will 

    never be quenched.

Though the Dark One comes in all his strength, I shall not be

    daunted,

Though he attack with his mighty armies, though he strike me with iron

     and fire, with all his grievous weapons,

Even should he turn his deadly eye upon me, fear will not defeat me. 

I will arise, and he will be shaken where he stands, and his sword 

     will be shivered in the dust,

For he is blind and knows nothing of love, and it will be love that

     defeats him.

From The Song of Maerad, Itilan of Turbansk 

{Excerpted from The Singing by Alison Croggon}

I could go on about these books for a long time. Heck, I could write a few more paragraphs just about the music in the books (something that particularly intrigues me as a musician). But I think I've written enough.

I'll leave you with this: read these books. Seriously. You won't regret it.

AJOA: Day 2

Day 2: A favorite movie

This one is nearly as hard as choosing a favorite song, because I love movies. Love 'em! So I'm going to have to pick one of my favorite movies, because I can't narrow it down to just one.

After a lot of thought, I've decided on Monty Python and the Holy Grail. I. Love. This. Movie. I love the fact that you can quote almost any given line and people (read: nerds like me) will know exactly what you're talking about. I'd give a summary of the plot, but most people already know it, and it's largely irrelevant anyway.

Basically: it's a classic. Not much else to say.

"Your arm's off!" ... "No it isn't."

A Journey of Abouts: Day 1

So, my friend Jessica is doing this on her blog this month, so I thought I would do it on mine as well, as a way to really get my blog started. Basically, I'm going to write every day about one thing. Here's the list:

Day 1: A favorite song.
Day 2: A favorite movie.
Day 3: A favorite book.
Day 4: A favorite television program.
Day 5: A favorite quote.
Day 6: A moment you wish you could relive.
Day 7: Five things you couldn't possibly live without.
Day 8: A thank you letter to someone who has changed your life.
Day 9: A photo you took.
Day 10: A photo of you taken over ten years ago.
Day 11: A photo of you taken recently.
Day 12: A song that you want played at your wedding.
Day 13: A pastime favorite.
Day 14: A vacation you would like to take.
Day 15: A person you admire.
Day 16: A song that makes you cry.
Day 17: An art piece.
Day 18: A time when you felt passionate and alive.
Day 19: A talent of yours.
Day 20: A hobby of yours.
Day 21: Something you know you do differently than most people.
Day 22: A website.
Day 23: A way in which you want to be remembered.
Day 24: A movie no one would expect you to love.
Day 25: A recipe.
Day 26: A childhood memory.
Day 27: A physical feature you love.
Day 28: Hopes, Dreams and plans you have for the next 365 days

Just to let you know, this doesn't mean I'm going to stop posting poetry. Far from it. This is just a way to get me writing more regularly. Okay, ready? Here goes.

Day 1: A favorite song

Um, just one? Okay. Fine. It's pretty much impossible to choose my all-time favorite song, but here's one I really love: Miracles out of Nowhere by Kansas. Kansas has been one of my favorite bands since I was about 12, and this song is, in my opinion, one of their best.

The best part of the song starts at about 2:20 on the video below. This instrumental interlude has always captivated me, and exemplifies why I love this band. It's incredibly creative and completely different from anything else you'll ever hear in popular music nowadays. For one, it uses counterpoint. For another, it's in 7/4 time. It's a joy to listen to. I can't think of any other band that incorporates such complex musical ideas and pulls it off so brilliantly.

The reason I chose this song is that it's the perfect example of what I aspire to create as an artist (writer, musician, etc.). Not something that just sounds like what everyone else is listening to; something different. Something genuinely great. I may never write something half this creative, but listening to good music never ceases to inspire me.